The Morning After
by piloqutinnguaq
Summary: Darcy Lewis had a long history of doing stupid things while drunk, but she'd never gotten herself into quite this much trouble. The apple never does fall far from the tree.
1. The Morning After

Darcy Lewis had experienced her fair share of wild nights (and the occasional wild morning). She loved to dance, she loved to dress up, and she loved how surprisingly well she could hold her liquor. At twenty four and with a brand spankin' new degree in her hand, though, the appeal of getting black out drunk was starting to fade. It didn't help that Jane constantly reminded her of the time she had come in to work so hung over she had recorded every single number backwards. Or the time she had made out with Norman Lunkis, the least attractive guy on campus. Or the time she had gotten a Day of the Dead skull tattooed on her ankle. So, maybe sometimes she didn't hold her liquor _that_ well.

Her tattoo totally looked badass though.

Still, in her herculean history of hangovers, Darcy had never ever felt as shitty as she did when she woke up after Thor's birthday. She was in a room she didn't recognize—by the looks of it, a Stark room and not a SHIELD room—and she was still wearing her green dress from the night before. Her tongue felt like a rock, her mascara had glued her left eye shut and there was glitter in her hair. When she found her iPhone, she was pretty sure the pictures on it were going to be legendary.

If she ever found her iPhone, or her wallet, or the lipstick she had been carrying around for touch-ups. She didn't even know where _she_ was.

_Owww, barracuda! _

Darcy sat up too quickly and the room spun. Her ringtone was emanating from somewhere in the other sofa. Never one for the subtle approach, she ripped all the cushions off the thing and reached both arms in, searching for the purple, glittery case of her phone. Suddenly, it was in her hand.

"AHA! Hello?" she announced. There was a pause. "Hey? Anybody there?"

"Darcy, it's Bruce. Are you okay?"

Darcy looked around the room again. It didn't look like too much of a disaster, she had her phone, and she was still wearing underwear. "I think so. I mean, clearly had a great party last night. Not really sure where I am though. What's up, B? You never call me."

"You don't remember anything do you?"

"Uh. I know it was Thor's birthday and Tony threw the party and I have this feeling like tequila is so _not _my lady. And I'm in Stark's house. Somewhere. Maybe," Darcy said. She inspected one of the bookcases—it was a mixture of advanced physics and what looked like an impressive dirty novel collection. "Uh, scratch that, definitely still at Tony's place."

"You called me yesterday at five. You didn't—you seemed pretty gone already."

"Oh? What did I say?"

"You told me about your family… you said you wanted me to help you find your dad."

"Well. Fuck," Darcy muttered, sinking into the cushion-less couch. Her mom had gotten pregnant after a one night stand in college and had moved her out to the middle of nowhere Midwest when Darcy was three. Darcy was pretty sure her mom didn't have any idea who her father really was and Darcy knew better than to ask her about it if she did.

"So. I… well. You seemed really insistent about doing it. I might have run your DNA profile through the SHIELD database. On a whim, really. I didn't think anything would come up. But, Darcy—I think you should go home, have a shower, and come meet me in the lab."

"Are you fucking joking, Bruce? I'll see you in ten minutes."

"Darcy, wait—"

She ended the call and, after a quick but fruitless search for her shoes, dashed out of the room. The hallway looked vaguely familiar; she was definitely still in Stark's apartments in the Tower. The main labs were about twelve stories down. It was long and uncomfortable elevators ride down with a SHIELD employee and a hard sprint down the halls to Bruce's office.

"Bruce fucking Banner you better get real right now."

Bruce was not alone. Sprawled in one of the desk chairs across from the bench Darcy was leaning on was Tony Stark, looking mildly confused and a little worse for wear from the night before.

"Yeah, Smash-bro, mind telling me why I'm putting up with this and my massive hang over?" Tony asked, taking a curious look at Darcy's more than slightly dishelved appearance. "Fun night last night Lewis?"

"You have no fucking idea."

Bruce moved a hand across his exasperated face. "Last night, Darcy, while hideously intoxicated, asked me for a favour. She wanted me to help her find her father with DNA testing. I—well, I checked anyway. Darcy—you and Tony are a perfect match."

Darcy looked towards Tony Stark and her hung-over brain started to piece together some terrifying ideas. They did have similar colouring and the same shapes in their noses and cheekbones. She remembered one morning at an early meeting noticing that she and Tony drank the same coffee and ate their bagels the same way—from the inside out.

"It is too early and I am way too hung over for practical jokes, Banner. I don't know how they paid you to do this, but, seriously, fuck off," Tony said, rolling his eyes and smoothing back his mussed hair.

Bruce pulled two DNA profiles up on the mainframe screen; one labelled Lewis, D. and the other labelled Stark, T. The alleles were all there. Darcy counted them herself. She took a heavy seat in one of the stools by the lab benches.

"This is not a joke, Stark. When have I ever gotten involved in your childish wars with Barton and Natasha? I'm sure. There is literally no uncertainty. You are Darcy's father."

"This is ridiculous. I think I'd know if I had any kids. I mean, I don't exactly sleep with the kind of women who would keep that quiet. Do you know how much child support I could pay? Darcy, tell him this is insane."

"It's not," Darcy said quietly. Her headache was getting progressively worse. "My mom's name was Josie Lewis. She got pregnant in her first year at Yale, New Year's Eve of 1988. I don't think she knew his name and she never tried to find him. If you were there, it is entirely possible that you're—that we're related."

Tony frowned deeply and ran a hand through his hair again. He looked like he wanted to start pacing. "I don't remember 1988, Darcy, that's a long time ago. Yale? I don't think I was ever—oh my god. This is insane. Do you have a picture of your mom?"

Darcy pulled out her iPhone and brought up her photo gallery. She had two or three older photos from when she was young with her mother. Josie was petite and voluptuous, like her daughter, but had sunny red hair and freckles. Tony scanned the pictures for five long minutes, eyebrows furrowed.

"Jesus fuck. I—I went to a party up there for New Year's 1988. I remember her. Her hair. She was the only redhead there. I didn't—I didn't know her name either. I was a different person then, Darcy, you have to know that. But I swear if I had any idea you existed I would have ripped apart mainland USA looking for you," Tony said pathetically, sinking into his seat again. The phone hung limply in his hand.

"Well, this is kind of hard to take for me too," Darcy said, taking the chair beside him. "I guess fate brought us together after all, though, huh? I mean what are the chances of us meeting like this?"

"Astronomically small," Bruce interjected.

"Thanks, B, I didn't realize. Tony, I know this is a lot of information right now. I don't expect you to act any different around me. After my mom died last year, I just wanted to know _who _he was. I've lived for almost twenty four years without a father and I don't expect you to just step into the role overnight. I'd like us to be friends, at least."

Darcy stuck out her hand. Tony hesitated but he took it after a moment.

"We're already friends, Darce. I'd like to try and be more," he said with a weak smile. Darcy couldn't help herself. She hugged him and both of them nearly fell out of the chair.

"Woah! Okay, okay, start small though, I think I'm still drunk."


	2. It's a Girl (Interlude)

"Here," Pepper said shortly, shoving an agenda in Tony's face.

The superhero was bent over a half-assembled engine and something stopped him from making a typically asinine comment about his fiancée's tone. Pepper Potts did not betray many of her feelings. She had perfected the use of professional veneer, sharp tongued vagueness, and upright posture to conceal any or all of her misgivings about Tony Stark's behaviour. Tony was a man of many talents, however, and decoding Pepper-ese was most certainly one of them.

"Something happen?" he asked casually. Her right eyebrow rose slightly when he bothered to stop working and actually read what she had handed him.

"No. You have a meeting with Fury in two hours."

"Fury can suck it. What's up? Don't lie to me; it's treason."

The corner of her mouth slipped into the smallest of smiles, but it faded quickly. Tony, for once, was sure he hadn't done anything to make her so angry. He knew her birthday wasn't for two months, their anniversary wasn't for almost a year, and they had agreed not to talk about weddings until she felt like it was the right time. He had even remembered her drink order and started having it delivered at 3PM. Impersonal, but sweet, she had reprimanded him softly the week before.

"I think you should check your security on the lab," Pepper responded finally.

"What are you talking about? The only people with the codes are you, Rhodey, and… oh for Christ's sake," Tony put down the agenda and the wrench. He had forgotten all about giving Darcy all the codes a week earlier when she had insisted on a bizarre "bonding" ritual in which she sat around and criticized him while he worked. She had no talent at all for mathematics (he was mildly disappointed) but she did have a good eye for patterns and acceptable skills with cars. He considered letting her help him fix something to avoid ever having to listen to her explain the history of 90s hip hop again.

"Oh. So you let her in. Good."

"No, no, no," Tony backpedaled, "I can see where this is going—okay, I'm sorry, I should have told you when I found out. I didn't because I'm selfish and arrogant and I have no respect for other people's feelings."

"Well, I already knew that," Pepper said, surprisingly patient. There was a storm brewing behind her words.

Tony took a deep breath and prepared himself for the strangest thing he would ever have to say. "Darcy Lewis is my daughter."

Pepper Potts, for the first time in many years, slapped him right across the face.

"I put up with a lot of shit from you, but do not lie to me," the blonde spat out, shoulders tense and mouth hard. The ensuing pause was full of fear and all the unsaid things he had done to hurt her in the past and it stung. Tony was suddenly filled with regret and shame in a way he hadn't felt before.

"I know this is a lot, but it was—an accident. I mean," he struggled, trying to find words to explain, "I didn't find out until two weeks ago. I can show you the DNA if you really think I'm bullshitting you but I swear to God, really. I have a child. Who is not a child. She's an adult. Sort of. And you know, I'm trying to make sure she doesn't turn out so bad."

Pepper was quiet for a long time and seemed to be absorbing what he had told her.

"Where's her mother?" she asked. Pensive, as always. "Does she have anybody else?"

"Dead. She's got me. And you, hopefully."

"Oh," Pepper said, falling into one of the chairs behind the lab desk. She looked less angry, but more terrified. "Tony—I don't know if I'm ready to—to _parent_."

The superhero gave her a long look and then laughed more than he had in months. "Parent? What have you been doing with me for the past fifteen years?"

"Well...maybe it wouldn't be that hard."

"Perfect," Tony said, relief flooding through him. The couple shared a chaste kiss. "How do you feel about Disney movies?"

* * *

"Do you feel like there's something going on with Darcy and Stark?"

Steve looked up from his sketchpad, raising an eyebrow at Barton's suggestion. The archer shrugged and threw another dart with deadly accuracy.

"No," Steve replied simply. "Why?"

"They've been spending a lot of time together. The other night Darcy bailed on plans with Jane to watch Disney movies with Stark. That's pretty weird. Since when do they hang out and since when does Stark do movie nights?" Barton pointed out. The two Avengers were spending their downtime in the break room in between training sessions. There hadn't been a good mission for several weeks and Stark had started to spend a lot of time doing some unusual things with the former intern.

"Stark has always done whatever he wants. Maybe he's interested in her. As far as I can tell dating hasn't changed much in the last eighty years."

"He's kind of old for her. And doesn't he have a thing with Pepper?"

"They're engaged," Natasha added. Neither of the men had heard her enter. She was in a sports bra and lycra shorts and her hair was damp from her work out. Steve quickly averted his eyes; his cheeks dusted pink. "The two of you are not who I expected to be gossiping around the water cooler."

"You act like you don't want to know. If he's really engaged to Pepper, why's he running around with Darcy? It's fucking weird."

"Not really our business. Pepper's there with them half the time, anyway," Natasha corrected him. She took a long drink of water out of her bottle from the fridge. "Why are you so curious Barton? Jealous of Stark?"

Barton threw his last dart with extra aggression and it sank up to the quick in the wall.

"Ouch. I mean, he's ten years older than you and a complete dick. That one must hurt."

"You should really just ask Darcy about this," Steve said. "It's not going to do any good wondering about it and Darcy would be extremely upset if she knew you were talking about her."

Natasha nodded silently and Barton rolled his eyes. The red emergency alarm interrupted the archer's response.

_"Avengers, report to the west wing—we are in full red alert, that's a full red alert." _

"Guess you'll have a chance to work off some of that tension," Natasha drawled.

Steve scowled and Barton followed him as the three superheroes took off in a dead sprint towards the west side of the underground complex.

* * *

The post-mission debriefing meeting was far from usual fare. Tony's face was covered in an enormous pair of sunglasses and Barton looked decidedly moody. Standing behind them, Steve and Natasha looked like embarrassed, exhausted parents with squabbling toddlers. Thor was leaning with both arms on the table, eyelids dropping under the threat of sleep. Darcy stalked into the room, threw a stack of lab reports down on the table, and immediately zeroed in on Tony.

"What happened to your face?" she demanded. "His Highness told me the mission went well." She ripped the glasses off easily to reveal a generous black eye. Tony glared down at her.

"It wasn't the aliens, it was your fucking—"

"Shut up, Stark," Barton snarled, looking more than a little worse for wear himself. Darcy turned her concerned eye toward him and the tension in the room escalated immediately. Jane and Thor began whispering to each other with uncomfortable glances at the rest of the team.

"Darcy, this whole thing could be avoided if you could just clarify your relationship with Stark," Steve added patiently. "It was the cause of the disagreement. Not that such a thing will ever be allowed to happen again."

Jane blinked owlishly and elbowed Thor, who immediately sat up. "What do you mean, Steve?"

"Stark and Barton had a heated argument over Darcy—"

The resurrected avenger was cut off by Darcy's loud, flourishing laughter. She was wiping away imaginary tears after nearly half a minute of sobbing giggles. Natasha looked even more exasperated, Steve confused, and Jane rolled her eyes. Bruce Banner, still seated in the far corner, was unaffected by the entire incident.

"You thought Tony and I were like—like—oh my god, you're all batshit. Dude, Tony isn't _into_ me—he's my dad. Biologically speaking. And now you know, relationship wise. We're trying to make up for lost time not have some weird sister wives thing with Pepper. I swear to god, stop watching TLC."

The room was completely silent. Darcy could feel every pair of eyes on her.

"You sure you want to talk about this, Darcy?" Tony asked quietly.

"I never really cared about people knowing. I'm already a major terror target, now I just have a shitload of money to make up for it."

"Like I'm going to put you in my will."

"I've got Pepper on my side, old man."

None of the superheroes said a thing. Darcy raised an eyebrow and took on a decidedly Tony-esque smirk. "You're all regretting looking at my boobs now, aren't you?"

"Darcy, this isn't funny," Steve said. "Are you sure? How is this possible?"

"Yo, B, lay on the science!"

Every pair of eyes in the room swiveled towards Bruce Banner, who merely shrugged. "I did a basic DNA comparison. Darcy and Tony are both on file for SHIELD. They're a perfect match. There's a billion to one chance they aren't related. Along with the circumstantial evidence, there's no question. Tony Stark is Darcy's biological father."

"You knew? Why didn't you say anything before?"

"It wasn't my business," Bruce replied coolly.

Natasha rolled her eyes. "Of course not. Are you happy now, Clint?"

The archer looked decidedly unhappy, even more so than the day before, and fixed Tony with a stone faced glare. Thor clapped his hands hard enough to make a small sonic boom.

"Friends, surely this is joyous news. I now know the importance of family. A child should never be parted from its father," he said, surprisingly grave. Jane gave his arm a supportive squeeze.

"We're happy that you two are happy. I know how much you missed having a father, Darcy. This is the best thing that could have happened—relatively speaking," she added quickly with a suspicious look at Tony. Jane and Tony were not well-matched personalities and the only time they functioned at all was when both of them were in math-mode, as Darcy liked to call it.

"Yeah, good thing I got to hang out with both of yours. Not that it did me much good," Darcy said. "I guess I can stop having no strings attached relationships with bad boys now that I have a father figure in my life."

"I'm not sure Stark is the best role model for that," Steve pointed out dryly. Tony glared at him, mockingly horrified.

"This is calls for celebration! I will bring the ale!" Thor cried, practically leaping up from the table. All of the Avengers let out a groan, recalling the last time they had passed around the Asgardian brew.

"Oh, come on guys," Darcy exclaimed, giving Thor a playful punch to the shoulder. He rewarded her with a blinding smile. "We should celebrate. How bad could it get?"


	3. Kiss and Tell

Clint Barton was a master assassin, a secret agent, and a superhero, but he was really just a man's man. The kind of guy who you could count on to help you move, to share a couple beers, to know what model of car that was, to always stay at the gym a little longer than you did. He didn't get tied down. He didn't have girlfriends, just girl friends and he never ever met their parents. He didn't _do_ that kind of thing, just like he didn't do Christmas cards or grocery shopping or small talk. Clint Barton also had a very serious problem. Her name was Darcy Lewis.

At first, there was just office flirting. Or as close to office flirting as you could get when you worked with Stark on a daily basis, who seriously devalued shock value.

_"You know, one day you're going to give poor Steve a heart attack." _

_ "Nah," Darcy said flippantly, her fingers moving steadily across the keyboard. "I don't think it'll get that far. I'd have to actually flash him my boobs." _

_ She was rewarded with a laugh. Clint settled on her desk, arms folded, his face half as serious as his posture. "He seemed traumatized enough by whatever you did this morning." _

_ "Oh he didn't tell you?" Darcy paused, eyebrow raised. She made a terrible attempt at looking up through her lashes. "You know I like to tease him. I mean, it's just so easy. God knows Bruce Banner cannot take a joke. Natasha has a poker face like the iron curtain, for Christ's sake. Steve is fricken baiting me with all his blushing and his stuttering." _

_ "Why aren't I included in this?" _

_ "Barton, if you wanted me to get naked, you could have just asked. Don't worry, I looked up the specs for these S.H.I.E.L.D. desks— they can totally take us having mind blowing sex on top of them." _

_ Darcy took on a smug expression as congratulated herself on successfully intimidating an international spy and generally unflappable superhero. She went back to her latest Stark to English translation. _

_ "Don't tempt me, Lewis." _

Clint would adamantly deny he ever fantasized about mind blowing sex on one of the SHIELD desks, but Darcy Lewis had planted the idea in his mind and it took root like a vicious weed. He thought about it every time he saw her and soon there were naked ideas in his head every time they spoke. It almost seemed like Darcy was accepting, even enthusiastic. When he wasn't being sent to some backwater ex-Soviet state to kill warlords, he was hanging around the labs to see her and she had no complaints. He had it on good authority she asked about him on a regular basis.

Then, the unthinkable happened and Darcy Lewis became Darcy Lewis-Stark.

Clint didn't especially like Stark. No one did and Stark knew it and it was almost expected for him to be an asshole. There was a level of trust and teamwork, but the guy was a piece of work.

He was also Darcy's father. What did that make him to Clint? The politics of the team were already doused in rivalry, tension, and, if he was being honest with himself, resentment. Whatever he and Darcy had before was a powder keg. You did not get into a no-strings-attached relationship with your co-worker's daughter. You didn't even formally court her. There was no way around it—he had to avoid her and temptation at all costs.

He made this resolution right before Thor brought out the ale.

"Ugh, jerkface took my phone again. Hey, Barton, I know you have an extra around here. Seriously, get up, I have to call Jane and make sure Thor didn't break her."

Clint blinked slowly and assessed that he was in his own bed. He had absolutely no memory of returning to his standard SHIELD apartment. His last clear recollection was trying to out-drink the God of Thunder and judging by his headache, he had lost. Darcy Lewis, in all her glory—hungover, half dressed, mascara savaged—was standing over him. She was hitting him in the shoulder with a broom handle.

The only thing he managed to say was: "What the fuck are you doing?"

He inwardly congratulated himself on how romantic he was.

"Yo, no joke, you guys are nasty in the morning. One time I woke up Tasha and she almost broke my neck. But I actually really need a phone. It's 1 P.M. Tony is going to think I'm dead."

"The drawer closest to the fridge," he mumbled, rolling over so he could plant his face in a pillow. Darcy left, presumably to find the drawer, and Clint thought about his options. He had no memory of even speaking to Darcy the night before. Maybe she had wandered over after she realized her phone was missing? Unlikely. She lived in a tiny apartment that she paid for herself and wouldn't have taken the subway with no pants.

He had a terrible feeling about the entire thing, but he couldn't just _leave_. It wasn't an intern or even another agent. It was Darcy. She was pretty and smart and quirky and she danced like a white girl when Biggie's "Hypnotize" played. He liked having her around more than he cared to admit. Besides that, she was best friends with a God and his girlfriend, two meta-humans, and a spy. She was, he shuddered again at the thought, Tony Stark's biological daughter.

"Hey, do you want pancakes?" she called from the galley kitchen. "You have been asleep _forever_. I put fruit and shit in them and everything."

It felt good to wake up to someone and it felt better when she made breakfast.

"Hey Darcy, I was wondering if we could—" he started, wondering how he could possibly broach the subject of their relationship.

The phone in her hand began vibrating. 

"Sorry," she said quickly and then checking the ID on her phone mouthed "it's Tony" as she picked up the call. "Hey, where's the fire? I'm just… no, it's fine, I was just talking to Barton."

Clint had to admit that one stung. His mind was filled with doubt and all the repercussions of bringing up something Darcy might have wanted to forget.

"Okay, okay, I'll be there are at like eight. Not seven. Eight. Bye. What were you saying?"

Clint was not good at making up back stories on the spot. He had about a hundred memorized and convincing identities to pull from but he was no good at lying when he was Clint Barton. When Darcy was looking at him with her big blue eyes, he felt more confused than ever.

"Nothing, just—Tasha."

"Tasha what?" Darcy asked, shockingly tentative.

"Nothing bad, she's just um—girl problems. She has a girl problem. You should talk to her about it. Because you're a girl," he added for good measure, although Darcy looked unconvinced.

"Sure. I actually have to go to work today so… I'll see you later. Text me or whatever."

Clint, for the first time since high school, wanted to melt straight through the floor into the flames of hell. He was totally fucked.

* * *

Natasha took a hard swing at the wall and left a fist-sized hole that made Darcy cringe.

"Is there some kind of rule in this country that if you have a uterus you can't be taken seriously?" she muttered darkly, decimating the punching bag with a deadly kick. The other five had already felt her wrath before the intern arrived and Darcy was starting to question her decision to train with her. As many misgivings as she had about calling up The Black Widow, she admitted Clint wasn't lying about his old friend's girl problems. The red head was practically steaming.

"I take you seriously."

"I mean men."

Darcy dodged a twenty pound weight. "I think you mean one specific man here. And girl, you're preaching to the choir." Natasha let out a vicious final blow that split one of the seams and collapsed in the remains of the punching bag.

"I know," the super-spy said. "I'm not the only one with problems."

Darcy sighed and took a seat beside her. "Tony is kind of annoying, sure. He thinks we need to spend as much time as possible buying me all the shit I never had growing up and he has this weird idea I'm made of glass and need to be followed by personal security. But he's my dad and I'd rather have in my life."

"I'm glad you have each other, but I wasn't talking about Tony," Natasha corrected.

"Oh," Darcy said, feeling like she had really taken that twenty pound weight right in the chest, "So, who's got you all worked up?"

The spy gave her a sly sideways look. "It is… a sensitive situation."

"Come on, I am the official secret keeper of this dysfunctional little family. I promise I won't talk about it with anybody."

"Even Clint?"

"Especially Barton."

"It's Steve."

Darcy had to laugh—even with Natasha's somber face staring back at her. The spy's serious look flickered a little. "You know this is hilarious. He's like…a grandpa. When he was born women couldn't vote for Christ's sake."

"He was born in 1922."

"_My point is_ you can't expect him to just jump into this," Darcy said, waving her hands around the redhead, "and be all like well this is just dandy not like my life and perception of the universe has been totally destroyed over the past two years. Dude can barely figure out an i-Phone. I bet he hasn't even—oh my god. You guys—last night—you didn't!"

Natasha simply raised an eyebrow and her mouth betrayed nothing. Darcy gasped dramatically and put one hand over her heart. "You took his _virginity_? You are more woman than I will ever be, Natasha Romanov."

"I wouldn't say that."

"Okay, so, you had a fight—now is the perfect opportunity to introduce you to the grand American tradition of girl time," Darcy explained, "First, we are going to watch Clueless to remind us what love is like and then we're going to each eat our own tub of ice cream while listening to the ultimate Adele T-Swift break up medley."

It was Natasha's turn to let out a long sigh and defeated allowed Darcy to help her up.

"I'm going to need a drink," she said. "A strong one."

Darcy kicked the remains of the last punching bag out of their way, toward the horrified SHIELD agents who had just shown up for their afternoon session. "Oh, so am I," the brunette responded. "And you can tell me everything you know about Clint Barton."

* * *

Tony held Darcy out at arm's length with an experimental sniff. "You smell like vodka. Did you just not shower today? Is that a thing I'm supposed to talk to you about? Hygiene?"

"Um.. I was just with Tasha all day, girl problems, girl talk. Ice cream and martinis."

"You can always talk to me about your problems," Tony offered. When Darcy gave him a condescending look he added, "Or Pepper, you know, she's… wise."

The father and daughter team were at a fairground in New Jersey, mildly disguised by hats and sunglasses. Two SHIELD agents were attempting to follow them as discretely as possible but hardly blended into the well-tanned, under-dressed crowd. Night was falling slowly and the lights were starting to come on at the rides. Tony had originally suggested an impromptu trip to Disneyland but Darcy thought maybe they could start with something less gregarious.

"It was mostly Tasha. I don't have time for girl problems."

"Maybe you should make time. I spent a lot of my life running away from relationships because I was afraid of them and I just ended up missing your entire life," Tony said, surprisingly serious.

"Dude, stop, you're gonna make me cry. I think I've still got a few years left before this old body gives out on me."

Tony laughed. His mood has improved significantly since they had come out to the rest of the team, especially Pepper. The willowy blonde had been nothing but supportive and, in her own way, motherly and Darcy was grateful beyond words. She knew Pepper already put up with enough shit from her fiancé and the last thing she wanted to do was add to the pile. Everyone had been supportive—except for Barton. He hadn't spoken to Darcy or Stark until Thor made him drink enough ale to tank a horse. Fortunately, Tony had a few himself and hadn't noticed.

A shadow moved behind one of the stands. Darcy didn't take a second look, but watched for it again at the next one. It was there and the next, it was there. "We have some uninvited guests," she whispered.

"Maybe we shouldn't have lost the SHIELD tail," Tony said. "I haven't got much with me."

"I've got that taser they issued me and I stole one of Barton's knives this morning. It's on the inside on my belt."

"Why were you at Barton's this morning?" Tony questioned sternly, suddenly returning to a normal volume. Darcy shushed him, catching her first look at a dark-clothed, large framed follower behind a candy-corn stall.

She whipped out her recently recovered phone and sent off a myriad of text messages with the weekly emergency code-word (piñata). Her phone began instantly vibrating with the appropriate reply (birthday party). Tony stared at her the entire time, clearly expecting an answer. She rolled her eyes and scanned the crowd quickly for one of the SHIELD agents. She found nothing.

"Everybody is on their way. Let's see if we can lose him," Darcy started walking but her father didn't follow. "Seriously? Are we going to do this now? Wow, okay. I'm a big girl, thanks. We don't have to have the talk. I lost my virginity when I was _fifteen_."

"Oh really? To a thirty-something sociopath who kills people for a living?"

"_You_ are going to lecture _me_ about relationships? Jesus fucking Christ!"

It was at that moment two understandably annoyed SHIELD agents, Captain America, the Black Widow, Hawkeye, and Thor dropped into the middle of the fair. The crowd wasn't sure whether to scatter or to start taking pictures and settled for recording at a safe distance of twenty feet. The nameless agents who had meant to follow Darcy and Tony began to push them back further as best as possible, chattering incessantly on their radios.

"Where is the enemy?" Thor roared. The God brandished his hammer and the sky crackled.

"Take a Xanax, Thunder Dome," Tony snapped. He rounded on Steve and Natasha, who both looked suspiciously out of breath. "And why do the two of you look like you just spent seven minutes in heaven? Everybody on the team is fucking now? Oh, perfect."

"Get over it, Dad!" Darcy screamed. She muttered an apology to Natasha and the absent Jane before she kissed Steve and then Thor full on the mouth. The two superheroes exchanged equally confused looks. "There. Now I've kissed everybody. Can we all calm the fuck down?"

A flash exploded like a supernova over them and the enemy finally revealed himself: two paparazzi hauling two massive cameras and slack jawed doe-eyed looks. They began taking shots in rapid fire as Thor attempted to cheerfully pose and Steve hid behind the God's massive frame as much as possible.

"Fury is going to go nuclear," Natasha muttered. Darcy could only nod mutely and watch in abject horror as Tony punched Clint straight in the jaw.


	4. Immortality

Darcy was pretty sure Nick Fury hadn't been so angry since he lost his eye. The SHIELD Director had a separate meeting with the Avengers team because they were worried he might actually murder her. Her only glimpses of him were a dark figure stomping down the halls and snapping unnecessarily cruel things at his subordinates, who glanced at her with increasing hostility. Steve was the one who relayed everything to Darcy and pleaded her case, since Thor didn't understand the consequences of media leaks and Tony and Clint weren't allowed to speak if they wanted to keep their jobs or their lives. The resurrected Avenger had managed to get her off with house arrest and a serious dock in pay, meaning she'd have to move into one of the agent's apartments and be constantly monitored.

Two days after moving into the tiny white rectangle with its single bed and microwave oven, her mojo was taking some serious hits.

"Is he going to put an ankle bracelet on you?" Jane asked. The physicist was reclined on the tiny bed, bouncing a stress ball off the ceiling with shocking accuracy.

"No extra jewellery, but the door has a sensor on it and I can't leave the building without an escort. And no, you don't count. Nobody on the team does either," Darcy said. She grabbed the stress ball out of her boss' hand. "Just Fury's list of approved agents, to whom I am to report regularly. They took my phone and my i-Pod and my keys to my place and all I have is this shitty DVD collection and time to reflect on my actions."

Darcy gestured towards the built in bookcase that housed her well-worn graphic novels and all the movies she had scrounged from her mom's house. It also had her Avengers action figure collection, which always made Jane roll her eyes.

"This isn't a bad thing, really. You and Barton can spend some quality time together."

"Ugh, don't remind me. He got sent to Siberia or some shit," Darcy groaned and flopped beside her boss on the bed. The two of them barely fit, like teenagers squishing into one sleeping bag. "Things are messed up, Jane. You're so lucky you're betrothed to a God who has no superhot, nubile exes and okay I am not skipping over the God part, I have totally heard you guys have sex and it sounds like fucking rom-com climax."

"You mean you guys have… but I thought the other night? Isn't that why Tony punched him in the face?"

"Oh my god," Darcy said. She covered her face with her hands. "Please Jesus, deliver me from this living hell of cruel and unusual punishments."

"The tabloids can't decide if you're with, if that's any consolation. I think you and Steve have a popular fan following. Darcy Stark: The New Mrs. America?"

"The idea there are people who ship me with anyone is terrifying and I am almost glad I can't go outside," the brunette snapped. "Natasha thinks this is hilarious. I swear I almost saw her laugh when Fury was screaming at them. And Bruce is no help—tell him that when you go to work tomorrow. No help. Some superhero."

The physicist laid a comforting hand on her intern's back.

"Oh, I wouldn't be so sure," Jane cautioned her. "He's been getting a lot of texts from Tony lately. I think he got the short end of the friendship stick."

* * *

Bruce slid his hand behind his glasses and rubbed his eyes. He had almost gotten five hours of sleep until Tony had lit up his phone with emergency calls. The billionaire was sitting in an office chair in the middle of his empty lab, looking as disgruntled and contemplative and unshaven as when Bruce had left him six hours before.

"Do you think you're overreacting?" the scientist said. He was too tired to mince words. "I know Darcy is your daughter, but she's also an adult. Until last month you barely acknowledged her."

"I called you to talk about the nuclear fusion project."

"But that's not why you're still awake. Fury made it very clear—"

"Fuck Fury," Tony snarled, spinning aimlessly in the chair. The reactor in his chest let out a dull glow. "This isn't about our time out. Barton was totally mind fucked by an alien less than six months ago. Who knows what's going on up there? Never mind the fact that he kills people for a living. And he's 40 years old. What kind of 40 year old man wants to date a 24 year old girl?"

Bruce gave him a very pointed look.

"We're not talking about me."

"Darcy is not a child," Bruce said slowly. "She has a degree, a job, a gun even—she knows more state secrets than she is supposed to and she managed to make friends with Natasha Romanoff. I don't think you're giving her enough credit. You're not giving Clint enough credit either. Do you think he would risk getting involved with your daughter if he wasn't serious about it? He puts his work ahead of everything."

"Yeah," Tony mused. "Maybe Loki is still in his head. Maybe this is a plot to destroy us."

"So, we better not let him win, then."

"All we need to do is get Fury to decide it's too dangerous and send Barton on some crazy mission. Something with lots of exotic women."

"For a genius, you are incredibly difficult to reason with. Maybe Pepper could be—"

"Oh, shut up," Tony said. "I know. Too far."

"Punching Barton in the face was too far," Bruce added.

"He started that."

Bruce had never felt the urge to strangle someone like he did when he talked to Tony. The man looked _confused_, something Bruce never thought his friend and fellow scientist was capable of. He almost felt sympathetic.

"Well, I'm going to back to bed. I know you're going to do the right thing, Tony. You're her dad. You have plenty of time to think about this," he said finally, turning to leave. His watch said it was only 3AM. "Fury is going to keep her locked up for a month."

* * *

Darcy Lewis was the Harry Houdini of grounded teenagers. Sure, SHIELD had way more security than her mom's house, but her perfect record counted for something. When the opportunity finally presented itself to escape, she didn't have a plan. She did have killer heels and lipstick that would make Captain America blush, and she figured she could use that to her advantage. The two guards in the hallway had made the mistake of leaving before the night shift showed. She knew she had almost eight minutes to get off the residence floor and find Natasha, who would totally sneak her out. Darcy could not spend another Saturday night in her tiny white room.

She managed to get to the lab area before the alarms sounded.

_FULL SECURITY BREACH. ENGAGE LEVEL ONE SECURITY. _

The white lights went out and the red lights switched on and she knew there was a breach. She darted towards Lad 5A, the one with the panic rooms, but she was too late. The lab rats scattered to safety in an instant and Darcy was left to hide behind one of the desks. The ominous sound of military grade footwear came closer and closer to her hiding spot. She tried not to breathe too loudly.

"What do we have here?"

Darcy froze as all of her crazy villain alarms went off simultaneously. She had a horrible sinking feeling she had heard that voice before. "Um, nobody," she squeaked, not daring to turn around, "I'm just IT all I do is fix the email server! I won't say anything!"

"You're lying."

_Fuck_.

Three heavily equipped henchmen appeared around her and the fourth member of their squad, the speaker and apparently the leader, defiantly stared her down through his blacked out mask. Clearly she had not chosen the best hiding spot. Darcy decided the best course of action was to cave immediately.

"Okay, okay, I'm a lab assistant, but I'm just a level four—I barely transcribe the notes. I swear I don't know anything. Just please don't kill me," she pleaded. She willed herself to cry but she had never been a great actress. "I won't tell anyone!"

"She looks familiar boss," Henchman Number Three said. Darcy glared at him. Her cover was blown. She had never regretted the fairground incident more than she did in that moment.

"You're right," Number One said. "Let's put her on the plane with the other one."

Darcy finally felt the tears coming and did a mental victory dance. "Please, let me go, I'm nobody, I'm a lab gofer! I don't even have a real science degree! I'm too young! I'm still a virgin—okay, that's not true, but I was planning to have kids and I really think I'd be a good mom and I finally met somebody in real life instead of OKCupid— _oh_ my god please put me down!"

Henchman Number Two interrupted by throwing her over a shoulder in a fireman's carry. Darcy felt a sharp pain and then she began to slip into unconsciousness.

"Let's move out," Number One said. She struggled to hear his voice. "We don't want them to catch up."

Darcy groaned in pain as she was unceremoniously dumped in the cargo hold of the Jetson's limo. She had no idea how long she had been out, but it couldn't have been more than a few hours. There were more lights and buttons than Tron and Darcy struggled to see in the alternatively glaring and dim light. There was another captive five or six feet towards the front of the plane. When Henchman Number Three was called up to the cockpit, Darcy managed to crawl closer to the unconscious figure—a lithe body emerged from the dark, brown hair in a sleek knot, and the uniform she could recognize anywhere. It was Fury's Second in Command, Agent Maria Hill.

"Maria, wake up. Come on, girl, I need you," she hissed, kicking the older woman in the shin. Maria's eyes flew open but they were unfocused. "Hey, hey, stay with me—I think we got kidnapped by Dr. Drakken."

"Lewis? Why are you here?" she slurred. "I can't feel my hands."

"Fuck me. What eye does Fury wear the eyepatch on?"

"His… left."

"Perfect. You're going to be okay. What was the emergency word last week?"

"Pinata. I think I can move," Maria said. Her voice was less impaired. "They hit me with something. Have we taken off?"

"Yes. I can't see a hatch or parachutes. Serious safety issues. Do you think you can fly this thing?" Darcy asked, testing her shoulders before she tried rotating her hands to the front of her body. "I can keep them off you for long enough to get us on the ground."

Maria looked up at her in surprise. "You think you can handle all of them?"

"Well, no," Darcy admitted. "But one of us needs to fly and it sure as hell can't be me. So on the count of three."

Darcy soundlessly counted down, keeping her eyes on the door to the cockpit. They had taken her taser and even her jacket but they hadn't checked her thoroughly enough. She was wearing stilettoes, first of all, and Natasha had told her not to underestimate those as a weapon. There was also Barton's hunting knife, which she had kept, inside the waistband of her jeans. She knew at least four people plus a pilot were in the front half of the plane.

As Darcy raised her third finger, Maria stood carefully and tested her feet. She nodded at the younger woman and they moved forward quietly. Darcy put a shoe in each hand. Maria easily kicked open the door and rolled forward on the ground before Henchman Three or Four could draw a weapon; Darcy took her left shoe and shoved the heel through Henchman Three's ear. She gagged at the noise it made and supressed a disgusted squeal. Using her footwear as a pivot, Darcy pulled him in front of her to take Four's two shots. There was a shocking amount of blood splatter and she was almost overcome with nausea. Natasha never prepared her for how _gross _killing people would be. She had picked the biggest man first for a reason; she shoved him forward onto his colleague and Four was knocked unconscious as his head hit the wall with an unpleasant crunch.

The pilot let out a short scream as Maria smashed his face against the control panel and ripped him out of the chair. Henchman Two pulled out his gun but Number One put up his hand. Darcy kept her shoe out in front of her body like a sword.

"You're _not_ a lab rat," One stated. "But I did not expect this from you, Stark."

"Dramatic, but not my name. Do your research before you kidnap someone. Where the fuck are we?"

"Quebec," Maria said. She was frantically pushing buttons. "I think! We've got ten minutes."

"Oh, perfect."

"You are making a mistake. You don't need to die today," Number One cautioned.

"Sorry, I just fucked up your bro here with my shoe. Are you confused about who is giving orders?" Darcy snapped. Her heart felt like it was going to explode and her palms were sweaty and she had no idea how to get out of the plane but neither of her kidnappers needed to know that. Then, Henchman Two did the one thing she had been praying she could avoid. He raised his gun and fired straight at her heart.

She wasn't sure where the bullet hit her because her entire body was enveloped in white hot pain and two tonnes of adrenaline. Reflexively she threw her shoe and clocked Number One in the face as she pulled the knife out of her waistband. It went through Number Two's uniform like butter, right between the Kevlar plates like Natasha had taught her. He got a good hit in before he slid onto the floor and it stung the left side of her face, making her ears ring. Number One's hand went for his gun and Darcy felt her body freeze with unprecedented panic.

"Darcy!" Maria screamed. "Grab onto something!"

She saw a flash of red and gold and threw herself onto the co-pilot's vacant seat. There was a hard knock to the right side of the plane and the entire cockpit lurched over like a wounded bird. Number One went flying backwards. The ground was coming up faster than it should and Darcy felt like she was having an out of body experience. The back of the plane tore open like a dollar stone can. As Tony pried her out of the seat, she realized she had been clutching her right shoulder and blood was oozing through her fingers.

The forest floor they landed in was sparse and temporal. Darcy could see Thor helping Maria stand a few feet away out of the corner of her eye. The brunette appeared shaken but uninjured. Tony's helmet slid open and he was speaking but she couldn't hear him. He looked more terrified than she ever imagined being.

"Is this your blood? Jesus fucking Christ," he said. Darcy moved her left hand. She couldn't feel her fingers but she knew they were sticky with blood. Her sweater was totally ruined.

"I paid like fifty dollars for this," she mumbled. "This is never going to come out. Oh, fuck!" When she tried to move her jaw a sharp pain radiated across her skull. She tried to touch the side of her head but she had a hard time making her hand move in the direction she wanted.

"What did you do to your face?"

"Tony, he shot me. He fucking shot me. Isn't that against the superhero code? I think I killed him. I'm going to hell, Tony. But first I want a nap."

"No, no, no, stay with me," her father ordered. "You are not going to pass out. Captain! Get the fuck over here!"

"You're a good dad. You and Pepper should have a baby. We've only been related for a month and I totally love you. Even if you punched my sort of boyfriend in the face. Tell him… I'm sorry he's not even my boyfriend."

"She needs a hospital," Steve said from out the darkness enveloping her left eye. "It's gone clean through. I don't think it hit the artery but this is a lot of blood."

"Some of it is from Number Three…" Darcy muttered. "I stabbed him with my shoe. It was _gross_."

"She probably has a concussion," Maria's distant voice added. "Is the med-evac on the way?"

"Come on, baby, keep talking! Say anything."

Darcy smiled at her father and he tried to smile back. All the blood had gone from his face.

"I love that movie… tell Steve I'm not sorry I kissed him."

"I'm right here, Darcy, it's okay," Captain America replied. Darcy turned her head so she could see the side of his face. He was sitting on her left, but almost behind her, both hands where she guessed there was probably an ugly exit wound just below her right shoulder.

"It was better than okay for me. Steve, you should marry Natasha...she told me she loves you."

"She said that?"

"Well, no," Darcy admitted. "But she was... thinking it. I can tell. Hey, dad…?"

"Darcy? Don't go to sleep yet. We're almost there." Tony picked her up and she felt like most of her was left on the ground. The med-evac team hovered above them, engines buffeting the ground with blasts of air, shouting directions.

"I love you," Darcy said quietly. Her tongue felt like lead. "And you can't ….blame yourself… I want you to be happy."

She knew he was saying something to her, maybe even screaming it, and she could hear Steve right behind them, and Thor roaring something unintelligible, and the whirring of the med-evac jet coming closer and closer. Darcy couldn't keep her eyes open anymore. All the pain drained out of her body and everything went black. She always thought death would be a white light or her mother's voice but it was roaring around her. It felt like falling for a million million feet. Slowly, the noise faded too, and there was nothingness.


	5. Good Morning, Sunshine (Part One)

**THREE MONTHS LATER**

Miles of white tundra extended into the horizon, almost interchangeable with the sky. The only reminder that he was not walking on another planet was the sound of his footsteps in the snow.

A soft ring came from his supply pack. Clint Barton thought maybe he was hearing things, since he hadn't heard another human being speak in eight weeks. Then the ring came again. He threw the bag onto the ground and pulled everything out of it before he found the emergency phone. It rang a third time in his hand. He pulled down his scarf but he didn't answer it. Calls were bad news. Especially calls in the middle of five month recon missions in Siberia that were only half completed.

Maybe it was good news. Maybe Fury had realized the Avengers needed him. Maybe everything was going to go back to normal.

He pressed the green button.

"Hello?"

"Barton," Fury said from the other end. "Don't move. We've got a lock on your location and we're sending in a ride."

"You pulling me early? What happened?"

"…just get on the plane, Agent. That's an order."

The call ended abruptly. As the hover-jet descended towards him, Clint Barton felt his heart sink.

* * *

Thor smiled fondly at the photograph in his hand. He was always amazed by the realism in the tiny computer paintings. The one he held was a picture of him, the first of many taken by Darcy during his first few days on Earth. He understood the importance of photographs for mortals; they preserved a moment in a short, fragile life. It was a memory that could last untouched forever.

He glued it just to the left of center in the large piece of parchment Jane had procured. It was already covered in photographs that were either taken by or of the lab assistant and notes and even drawings from Darcy's friends and colleagues.

"It's wonderful," Jane said, wrapping her arms around him. "It's just like the one she made for us."

"I have one more. The Captain gave it to me." He unfolded a piece of heavy drawing paper. It was a portrait, drawn carefully in pencil. The image looked as though Darcy had been magicked onto the page. Jane got misty eyed as she helped her boyfriend paste it onto their collage.

"God love Steve. Now it's perfect."

Thor put a gentle kiss on the side of her head that held more meaning than any words. They shared a knowing look, although Jane was full of trepidation; Thor's eyes were full of encouragement.

"This is the only way," Thor said. "I promise."

"The only way," Jane agreed. There was a knock at the door and the couple was startled out of their embrace.

"Sorry to interrupt. Are you ready?" Pepper asked. She was wearing a very conservative, nearly oversized black suit. She clearly hadn't slept in days. Her eyes were dark and cloudy.

"Yeah," Jane replied with a weak smile. "We have to figure out how to carry this thing."

"There is no sign of Stark?" Thor asked. Pepper visibly winced.

"No," she said. "No there isn't."

Thor took up the collage and Jane stepped forward to give the Stark Industries CEO a delicate hug. "This is what we have to do, Pepper. It's what he would want. He will come back," she promised. "For you. And for her."

The strawberry blonde looked down at her and made her own attempt at a smile. Her hand lingered over her stomach. "For all of us."

The two women and the God made their way down the hall towards the main exit for SHIELD employees. A car was waiting, black and unmarked, and the collage filled up the entire backseat. Silently they drove together towards the intensive care room where Darcy Lewis lay dying, but none of them had any intention of saying their goodbyes.

* * *

"Have you lost your mind?" Captain America demanded. Natasha put a firm hand on his arm and a stern warning with her eyes. It did not go unnoticed by the other occupants of the room, but there were more important matters to discuss. The redhead cast a shrewd eye on her friends and teammates. Thor, Bruce, Steve, Jane, and Pepper had all assembled in the bowels of Stark Industry in the dead of the night.

"No one is saying our plan doesn't have risks," she assured calmly. Jane looked incredibly uncomfortable stuck between a somber Thor and an irate Steve.

"Darcy is in the In Between, a realm of neither the living nor the dead. We cannot reach her, but my brother's magic transcends worlds even my father does not know. Why not this one?" Thor asked. Even without his otherworldly trappings, he had the makings of an ancient village chief.

"She's in a coma, not a fairy tale. You are suggesting that we free a mass murderer. No, beyond that—a creature we don't fully understand, who is imprisoned on another planet," Steve rebutted. "Has everyone forgotten our duties? The oath we took to protect and serve?"

"I never took any oaths," Jane supplied. Pepper was tapping her pen nervously against the table. She checked her watch again and then the wall clock, as if to make sure she had set the right time. Natasha observed her carefully, the silent partner in their new deal.

"Loki has begun to repent for his crimes. He faces a millennia of unimaginable punishment. If we offer to improve his fate I believe he will assist us," Thor explained.

"How do you think he is going to help, exactly?" Steve asked. "You're supposed to be a doctor, Bruce. You think we can bring her back from the dead?"

"Well, we did it for you," Bruce noted dryly.

"Barton flies in any minute now," Natasha said, interrupting any more objections. "Tony is MIA and Darcy doesn't have much time left. She isn't getting better. I need your help to keep this under control until we can put things in motion. Otherwise, you can tell him we have to pull the plug, because I sure as hell am not going to do it."

The entire room went deadly silent. Steve was by all estimation extremely conflicted. Jane let out a long sigh, nearly on the verge of tears, and Bruce remained stone faced. A buzzing sound broke the pregnant pause. Everyone looked down, but it was Pepper who held up a glowing phone. She let out the breath she had been holding.

"It's Tony," she said, voice cracking. "It's a text from Tony."

"What does it say?"

"There's three of them_. I missed you. Don't be mad. 2A Block security lab_."

Then, every phone in the room lit up with the final message. The A Block was the secondary base with SHIELD's primary medical facility and all of its prisoner containment; it had maximum security holding rooms, one of Tony's suits, and the body of Darcy Lewis.

"I'll get Clint," Natasha offered. "We'll meet you there."

Everyone knew she meant _I will restrain him while you do what you need to do_ but no one said a word as they filed out of the dimly lit conference room. Natasha gave them a silent wave as she took off in the opposite direction and what remained of the Avengers made a funeral procession out of their trip to the A Block.

Tony was waiting for them when they arrived. He wore his usual uniform of t shirt and jeans and the glow of the generator in his chest peaked through the A in Black Sabbath. He was almost as haggard as Pepper looked, but otherwise appeared intact and unchanged, save for a little extra grey hair.

"Where on God's green earth have you been?" Pepper exclaimed. She shot forward, strawberry blonde hair flying like candy floss. For how angry she sounded she trapped her fiancé in a tender embrace. He whispered something to her the others could not here.

"Well, not our God's green earth," Tony added, "I guess you probably know why we're here."

"The Lady Darcy," Thor said plainly. "Surely you did not, Stark."

"Fucking right I did! You would have done the same thing."

"Wait—what exactly did you do?" Bruce interrupted their exchange with a calculating tone and shared a suspicious glance with Steve. Thor and Tony looked like guilty children.

"Now, I want everybody to promise they won't go running to Fury. We're all in this together. That means you, American Pie," Tony said, pointing towards Steve. The blonde was still scowling in as menacing a way as he could muster. "Just after we put Darcy in the hospital, Thor said something that… he gave me an idea about how to get her back."

"When they said she could not awake, I told him she was beyond the reach of our world," Thor interjected.

"But our world is not the only world. And who knows that better than our old friend Reindeer Games?"

"I don't even want to know how this was possible," Bruce said.

"This is insane," Steve muttered. Jane elbowed him. "He broke a madman out of prison!"

"Madman is really a relative word."

"Is he in one of the cells?" Pepper asked. Tony nodded and pressed one of the wall panels open, revealing the plain steel door on the far left wall that began to retract into the ceiling. As the light poured in from the widening gap, their old enemy was revealed. He was trapped behind a layer of unbreakable glass like a shark in an aquarium. Loki looked much the same, although dressed very plainly and even paler than before. He was nonchalant, even bored.

"You've made some lovely renovations," Loki said, as if he had been invited for dinner and was trying to be polite. He surveyed the empty white room. "Very… stark."

No one moved or smiled or took a single breath. The entire room was motionless. Loki shook his hands, which were secured in elaborate manacles. "Now, I can't do much with these on. I require a certain amount of freedom to… well, I assume you want a magic show."

"Brother," Thor said. Loki visibly flinched. "What do you about the realm between the living and the dead?"

"It's cold and awful."

"I asked you about crossing over," Tony said. "Could you bring someone from that world into ours?"

"I suppose it would be the same as sending them into it. Yes, given the right circumstances, I could. But why would I?"

"We're asking you to do it."

"Of course you're _asking me to_, but why should I do anything for you? Do you know what you have sentenced me to endure? A fate worse than death, worse than madness, worse than your human mind could ever imagine. Do you think you know suffering? Perhaps, I should _show you_," Loki spat. He transformed from the unassumingly human silhouette into something both feral and godly.

"Enough!" Thor exclaimed, voice rattling the walls. "We are willing to make certain compromises considering your punishment. You must first aid us. If you are successful, we will negotiate for leniency on your behalf."

"Who is it?"

"What?" Steve asked incredulously.

"Who is it?" Loki repeated. "Who do you want me to heal? Two are missing but I suspect neither of them would want my help."

"Why does it matter who it is? Either you're going to help us or you're going back to prison."

"If I am going to risk my life for a mortal, I would like to know which one. And pending my return to our world, I would like books. Perhaps a bed," Loki said. His face was straight but his eyes were wild and angry.

"Where have you been keeping him?" Bruce intoned. Even Steve raised an eyebrow. Thor merely shrugged.

"Your requests are more than reasonable. Her name is Darcy, she is the companion of Jane and the daughter of Tony Stark," the God of Thunder said, gesturing to both parties. Loki seemed to consider this information gravely.

"Very well. Where is she?"

* * *

Darcy Lewis opened her eyes. All she could feel was numbness and at first the world was a kind of Monet version of reality. There was a steady beeping in time with her pounding heart. Her limbs felt heavy, plasticized, and she struggled to process the tubes in her throat. She gagged as she tried to breathe and blinked rapidly to clear her vision. As things began to snap into place, the last face she expected to see came into to focus in front of her. Thor's psychotic brother, a Freudian case study and convicted murderer, was peering down at her with an eerie smile. He put one blue hand right through her forehead.

"Good morning, sunshine."


End file.
